Chill Pill

Maybe it’s the weather. 
It’s a fun challenge trying to strike that balance between looking forward and looking around exactly at where you are right now….I’ve practiced yoga for nearly a decade. I enjoy how it makes my head and my physical body feel. And I rely on my practice to remind me of the importance of being present.
It’s such a cliche, but I don’t know how I would manage if I didn’t allow that as an ‘excuse’ to shut some of the other noise out from time to time…I’ve lost that ability to focus lately, and am feeling a bit scattered as a result. Unable to turn on and off, unable to keep perspective, unable to remind myself of my goals and my purposes.
Again, nothing heroic or exceptional necessarily happening in my life. Quite the contrary, I think.
We’ve been through a big change, yes, and are days away from the big 6 month milestone of setting up camp in our new home… Which inherently implies that some things are starting to feel much more settled and predictable and comfortable.
But it doesn’t mean that day-to-day tasks and chores and duties can’t seem overwhelming or exhausting to the most organized, most calm, or most centered of people. It gets you, and it’s getting to me now.

A theme I continue to encounter, with mixed sympathies, I must admit, is the need to be kinder and gentler and forgiving of ourselves…
Not even just women or mothers. People in general , slogging along day-to-day, trying to be contributing, respectful, aware, involved global citizens.
Cut yourself some slack, I hear.
Give yourself a break, I read.
Allow yourself to make mistakes, I watch.
And really, it all resonates. How could it not?
Pressures of work, of child-rearing, of home-tending all conflicting on a daily basis.
Being a top-shelf mother, wife, sister, daughter, employee, friend, aunt, cousin, blah blah blah… It’s no wonder we reach for the Top-shelf when it seems like we aren’t reaching anything even close to mid-shelf
And while saying these things are making me cringe ever so slightly at the teenage-angst-wridden-whiny-voiced-self absorbed –esque tone that it could represent, I think it’s still healthy to recognize the funk, the struggles, however big or small we or others might think they are in comparison to others, however fortunate or stretched we might see ourselves on whatever day, and use this reflection to gain perspective. To remind ourselves of where we are, where we’re going, where we want to pause…. And centre. For a moment. 
 
Don’t take ourselves too seriously. Be kind to others. And smile. That’s what I’m centring on today.
While I hear the taxi horns honking and look out at both the Empire State Building and the Chrysler Building from my office desk.

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